So the glum little Galu tribe is heading back to camp, with Shambo's hair leading the way in the darkness, after Yasmine's eviction. Sham's feeling a little blue, since she didn't know the tribe was voting for Yasmine and she's the only one who voted for Monica. So how does Sham deal with it and try to get back in swing with the tribe? She goes to bed.
Shambo, honey, we've talked about this. Even if you can't stand anybody in your tribe, you've got to pretend that you like them and fake all the bonding crap, even if it makes you throw up a little.
So, of course, we have a scene on the beach with the Galu tribe members who are not so sleepy. They're not really keen on Shambo, especially Monica. "She's my next choice."
Roll opening credits.
We're still at Galu, and we have scenes of Erik "washing" himself by scrubbing down with sand, and then he gets knocked over by a giant wave when he tries to rinse off. I have no idea why they showed this scene.
Cut to Foa Foa, where they are reading new tree mail. The next reward challenge is a food challenge, which means they will be eating nasty crap that the producers can find lying or swimming around. Ashley's all gung ho about it. "I'll try anything once." I'm sure she has.
Then we have Liz working bad Russell, telling him that Ashley will fail. My immediate thoughts are that Liz herself is worried about failing and trying to divert attention. After all, Ashley has piercings, Liz does not. This says a lot about people, seriously.
Russell is not happy with Liz's move, racing to tell Jaison and Mick about it. Once again, Russell is irked that someone else in the game is trying to play strategy, so he's trying to slam Liz just because she refuses to be a total sheep. This guy is just messed up.
So we get to the Reward Challenge, and yep, Jeff is going to make "Samoa Smoothies" out of nasty-looking creatures from the sea. One member from each tribe does this little roulette thing, and then Jeff mixes up the ingredients based on where the ball lands.
In a change from previous disgusting-food competitions, you don't have to be the first to finish your nastiness to get a point, you just have to finish your drink period. Which means the only way a tribe loses is if someone refuses to finish. Making you a huge target. Not sure if I care about this angle.
Anyway, Shambo and Jaison are the first up, and Sham slams down her concoction in about three seconds. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, since Shambo does look like a person who has eaten a lot of things that nobody else would. She's that kind of girl. Jaison finally finishes as well.
So we go through several rounds, with a member from both sides managing to do their duty. Until we get to the round with Dave (Galu) and Ashley (Foa Foa). Dave sucks his down almost as fast as Shambo, although he does pause to provide us with some very pleasant retching noises along the way.
But Ashely? Girl is in trouble, which did surprise me. She jacks around for a while, but finally cannot do it, throwing back into her glass a leftover that looks about the size of sugar cube. Oh, come on. You had it down to THAT and you're going to call it quits. Not a good move, Ashley.
So Galu automatically wins Reward, which is a nice spread of fixins for a barbecue.
Now, in the other twist that I don't really care for this season, Russell, as leader of the winning Galu tribe, has to send someone from Galu to live with Foa Foa, meaning they miss out on the reward, in this case the barbecue. Amazingly, he picks Shambo, the girl who gulped her drink down so fast I'm sure she could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch in three seconds.
And Shambo is NONE too happy. She argues with him (have we seen THAT before?), but he sticks to his choice, and she stomps off to join Foa Foa. Guess the girl ain't gettin no meat.
And Sham continues her stomping all the way to the Foa Foa camp. Once there, she goes off (again) on the Galu tribe. Can't stand them. At least with this tribe, "there are no hidden agendas here." (What the hell? Quick reaction shot of bad Russell about to wet himself.)
Quick sidebar with Mick mad about Ashley losing the challenge.
Longer scene with Natalie and Ashley in skimpy bathing suits on the beach, with Natalie trying to keep Ashley's spirits up while the waves caress their tawny bodies. With the way they were hugging and patting on each other, I was half-expecting a lesbian love scene while tropical birds chattered in the background. (Not that there's anything wrong with it, that's just where my mind went.) But we didn't go there.
Back at Galu, semi-good Russell tells the rest of the tribe that he sent Shambo because she lost the chicken. (But she helped you win the competition and she's already been once.) She had to suffer the consequences. (But she helped you win the competition and she's already been once.). The rest of the tribe just looks at him like, dude, YOU'RE the one that sent her, and you're the one who will have to deal with her when she gets back. Not my bad.
As for the barbecue, Russell is unable to start a fire in order to cook the meat, spending a lot of time getting nowhere. Dave, because he does have a little bit of an attitude, but also because Russell doesn't know what he's doing, makes a slightly derogatory comment about Russell's fire-starting abilities.
This turns into an extended scene with both of them playing the man-card and taking verbal swipes at each other. It's just stupid. Both of them are just being jerks, Dave more so at the end. Can we just cook the meat already? Geez.
Dave finally steps in and has to start the fire. In about two seconds.
Cut back to Foa Foa, where the steamed Shambo has decided to share ALL the clues about the Immunity Idol with the whole Foa Foa tribe. (Girl is really crazy and not thinking right, why would you help other people find the Idol, but in her defense, maybe one of these Foa Foa people might just remember this action and help her out at a critical moment. Or not.)
So once again, Shambo, in front of everybody again, burrows her way into that damn tree where the Idol SHOULD be, but of course it's not because Russell already found it.
And interestingly, in a sidebar, Liz reveals that she thinks Russell has it. And then she goes to confront him about it. "I think you're lying to me." (Oh gawd.) And, as we now expect from bad Russell, he goes off about being threatened. "You wanna be the one to go next? You're walkin on thin ice." Blah blah blah. Same crap. Just WHAT happened to this man that he thinks everyone is threatening him? Seriously, what?
And during the whole scene, he's wearing some horrid plaid capri pants that would make even a loving mother disown their child.
Cut to Galu, where it's pouring down rain. Buckets. Everyone is soaked. And the girls who so badly wanted the foo-foo pillows instead of the tarp are regretting their decision. (Ya think? Always choose the tarp first. Always.)
Then Dave goes to get fresh tree mail, although he nearly dies in the process because everything is flooded and he basically has to swing to the tree mail tree on a vine.
Tree mail says: Time for the Immunity Challenge.
So off we go, with everybody shivering in the rain. Jeff tells Shambo and her hair that she can rejoin her Galu tribe. When she does so, only one member actually greets and hugs her. The rest just stand there.
Jeff can't resist this, and points it out to the rest of the Galu tribe. Monica: "It's just a game, it's raining, and we're all trying to stay warm." Hmm. Shambo ain't gettin no lovin.
So the challenge involves members of one tribe throwing coconuts into hanging baskets connected to a rope held by members of the other tribe, two on each tribe holding a basket. The rest of the folks try to get coconuts into the opposing tribe's baskets.
This doesn't take very long. Galu is on fire, hurling coconuts into baskets like their asses are on fire. Foa Foa Russell goes down first (hurray, can't stand him). Foa Foa Liz holds out much longer, REALLY giving it an effort. But eventually she drops as well.
Galu wins Immunity.
So we're back at the Foa Foa camp, where folks have to decide who's going home. Trouble is, it's still pouring down rain, and it's cold. Everyone is huddled in the little tent. There's no option to race off into the juggle with one or two cohorts and plot strategy.
Bad Russell asks: "Are there any volunteers?" Liz immediately screams "Not me!" The rest just kind of sit there, saturated. Ashley then offers: we either all talk it out right here, or we decide everyone is going to make their own decision and we all take our bags to tribal. Apparently it's Plan B, as it seems no one is interested in revealing any alliances.
Sidebar with Jaison: He's still whining and complaining about being out here and hating it. Then dude, go home. Tell people that's what you want.
Sidebar with Russell: Still whining and complaining about Liz "threatening" him, but he does admit that Liz is stronger than Ashley. Then shut UP already.
We get to tribal.
Jeff asks Jaison if this is the hardest thing he's ever done. Yes, it is. Horrible. Perfect opportunity for him to say that he's ready to go. But he doesn't. Which means even more sidebars with him in the future where he's a titty baby.
Jeff asks Russell if the voting is starting to change, with people going for trust over who can physically win challenges. Russell: "Trust is like gold in this game." Oh please. YOU said that?
Jeff asks Ashley who SHE trusts. She briefly mentions Natalie, then gushes over Russell, looking at him as if she's prepared to wash his feet with her hair. Blech.
Jeff back to Russell: What do you think about the vote being so up in the air?
Russell: "I don't think it's up in the air."
Hmmm. So it's a slam-dunk on somebody, despite the supposed inability to talk strategy when they were all crammed together in the rain
Turns out, the slam-dunk is Ashley. She gone, 6 to 1. Even her buddy Natalie said bye-bye.
Moral of the story: If the competition involves Samoa Shakes, and all you've got left is a tiny piece of nasty something, then you choke down that bitch pronto instead of throwing it back at Jeff and then running to barf in the shrubbery.
Just sayin.
No comments:
Post a Comment