Sunday, September 6, 2009

#72 - Big Brother - Season 11, Episode 26

We start out with the announcer reminding us that the Pandora's Box is back in play for the new HOH. I'm hoping that this will involve Natalie getting smacked down in some way. One can dream, right?

Speaking of, Natalie is in the Diary Room, still babbling away about how she's the one that got Jeff out of the house. She is NOT the one that pulled it off, but I'm tired of dealing with delusional people, let her think what she wants.

Scene with Jordarn, crying, where everything sucks. Yes, sweetie, it does. So are you gonna do something about it or just lay there and wait to get evicted?

Michelle in the Diary Room, convinced that she's leaving.

Lots of scenes with Natalie really, really excited about winning HOH. Too many scenes, and the girl will NOT shut up about it. Yes, you won. Yay. But seriously, Jesus did not walk across water to annoint you as his successor. Settle down a little bit.

Natalie tells Kevin that they are definitely the final two, and that she wants Michele gone.

Kevin in the Diary Room, still hating on Natalie. Okay, sister girl, here's the deal. You keep whining about Natalie, fessing up that you know she will drop you, but what are you doing about it? Have we had a scene where you confront Nat and say, yo skank, what are your plans? Just asking.

And again with Jordan, wallering around on some random bed, not wanting to be a part of any more scheming, she just wants to be left alone. Peaches, you are in the Final Four. You could feasibly win this. No time for tears.

Then, surprisingly, Natalie actually tells Kevin that he has to go up to ensure that Natalie gets Michele out. Kevin, understandably, doesn't exactly turn cartwheels upon learning this bit of news. The pawn option is a risky path.

Natalie in the Diary Room: I have to throw Michele and Jordan off by making them think that I'm not that close to Kevin. (Are you serious, Gnat? You think the girls are going to believe that at this point?) Then Natalie states that Jordan is not smart enough to figure out what Nat is doing. Um, Nat, last time I checked, you weren't smart enough to figure out that Jessie was playing you, and you still love him. Just sayin.

Then Natalie shows off her new HOH room while wearing a two-piece swimsuit. That makes sense. Everybody in all the photo's looks WAY over 18 years old. Are any of the house guests catching on to this?

Natalie tells Michele and Jordan that she fully intends to put Kevin up, that she has no intention of taking him to the end. Even Jordan is not buying that load.

Natalie in the Diary Room: "I'm good at throwing people off." Yes, you are. But not in the way that you THINK you are.

Then we have the Luxury Competition. Basically, they split into two teams, with each team having to yell over a wall and find matching pieces of clothing. In the end, the house guests have a little over three minutes to race through a boutique and grab as many items as they can and they get to keep them.

The girls aim for clothing actually hanging on the various racks. Kevin decides that he wants the entire outfit that one of the mannequins is wearing, so he proceeds to demolish the mannequin, with plastic legs and arms and a torso all over the place. It's like Hannibal Lecter went shopping on a bad day.

Kevin approaches Michele about partering up to be in the Final Two. "You and me take Natalie out!" Michele looks appropriately stunned, but acts all gung ho about it. (On the flip side, Michele could use this little tidbit in her dealings with Natalie. Use this info wisely, Michele.)

Natalie meets with Jordan, and talks about THEM being in the Final Two. All KINDS of gameplay going on here, folks.

Natalie wanders into her HOH Room, and it's time for Pandora's Box, Part II. Turns out, Natalie can spend time with a loved one, if she gives up her chance to play in the Veto Competition. Nat doesn't hesitate (proving once again that she will satisfy her immediate wants and needs without considering the big picture), and opts to meet the loved one, screw the Veto Competition.

So she races in to meet her loved one, her boyfriend, who, amazingly, drops to one knee and proposes to her. He's actually very moved by the opportunity, and starts crying during the proposal. Natalie, who apparently has no emotions, just looks at him as if she'd like another waiter for her table. Not a tear in sight.

They only have 5 minutes for this bit of business. But then she's offered an opportunity to spend an additional 15 minutes with boyfriend, but the rest of the house will have to suffer while she does so. Again, no hesitation on Natalie's part, she is so self-centered.

So, while Nat and boyfriend enjoy a quick sushi dinner, the other houseguests are tormented by odd little creates racing through the house. A giant needy baby that will not shut up, a "copy cat" little person that repeats their every action and word (Jordan: "He was cute, but I wanted to kill him."), and a giant roach thing that sprayed bug kill on the house guests.

The traumatized house guests then go up to Natalie's HOH Room. What the hell is going on? Natalie, realizing it's not going to be easy explaining to Kevin that she just gave up her right to play in the Veto Competition for a few minutes of sushi and a marriage proposal, goes way left and makes up a bogus scenario.

Natalie launches into detail about some "Final Two Reversal" thing where she was blind-folded, ear-muffed and water-boarded and can now no longer win the game, the best she can do is second place for $50K. Even if I LIKED Natalie I wouldn't buy it, and everyone is looking at her like she's ate up with the dumbass.

Kevin in the Diary Room: "Bitch, you lyin'." She got something out of this.

Cut to Kevin, Michele and Jordan in the courtyard, trying to figure out what the hell THAT was all about, all of them convinced that she's not telling the whole story. Natalie wanders out, and makes it worse by saying "don't ask me any more about Pandora."

Kevin confronts Natalie in the HOH Room. "If you really lost $500K, you'd be breaking windows." True enough. Natalie folds, and says she'll tell everybody what went down.

But she doesn't. Meeting with the others, she fesses up to her boyfriend showing up and proposing, but that everything after that was just her having some fun with the house guests. Hee hee. Not a word about not getting to play in the POV competition. For once, Kevin, Michele and Jordan are all on the same wavelength. If that's ALL it was, then what was all that other crap?

Kevin in the Diary Room: "I betcha her name is not even Natalie."

Then the announcer invites the viewing audience to vote for their favorite house guest, who will receive $25K. My bet is on Jeff.

Leading up to the Nomination Ceremony:

Jordan in the Diary Room: "Jeff told me to stick with Michele. I don't listen to Kevin and Natalie."

Natalie in the Diary Room: "I'm hoping to hide my allegiances." Girl, please. Ain't nobody buyin.

At the Nomination Ceremony, where Natalie is wearing some stupid-ass outfit involving a lobster crown and waving a cue bridge she stole from the pool table in the courtyard, she pulls the single key to save Jordan and therefore puts up Kevin and Michele.

Natalie to Kevin: You said this was a game of chess, and I'm three moves ahead of you. I want you out.

Natalie to Michele: You are a liar, and talking to you is like making a deal with the devil.

On the surface, she's not even minimally nice to either one of them. I'm just going to assume that this is an attempt to get Jordan on her side. But even taking that into consideration, she basically burned EVERYBODY.

Kevin in the Diary Room: "Natalie screwed me over by opting out of the Veto Competition." Hold up. What? How does Kevin know about the Veto Competition angle? WE know that, but we didn't see any scenes where Natalie fessed up to that. Did the producers screw up yet again?

Michele in the Diary Room: "I am NOT taking Natalie with me with I win HOH next week." I'm right there with you, girl. But you have to survive the Eviction this week.

And then we have the announcer letting us know that Tuesday's show will have both the Veto Competition AND the Eviction Ceremony. Interesting. That's a fast track. Something's brewing here. Some more manipulation by the BB Producers?

Just sayin.

2 comments:

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  2. Michele, snap out of it and be the fighter you need to be to win POV!

    Jordan, well let's just say the lioness lacks courage.

    Kevin, he's damn smart and playing the game very well!

    Gnat, someone needs to take the BIZSNATCH down a notch. "I did.. It was I.. Because of me..", she hasn't done CRAP!

    I agree you EB with BB Producers fast-tracking the near end of Season 11, but why? Perhaps ratings are up and this could be CBS' pièce de résistance to seal the deal on Summer ratings and springboard BB to a new level?

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