We start with Jackie and Dr. O’Hara chattering outside the hospital. Seems Jacks wants to send troubled little Gracie to private school, but it’s so expensive, yadda, yadda. O’Hara offers to pay for BOTH girls to go to school, but Jackie declines. Then we get to the real point of the scene, which is that O’Hara is wearing two different shoes.
This is an obvious sign that something is terribly amiss with O’Hara. But we don’t go into the details just yet, apparently that juicy tidbit is being saved for later in the show.
Back in the hospital, we have a stabbing victim and his emotional date. Turns out her ex-husband showed up for their date and went all Benihana, even though there was a restraining order against him according to the tear-stained date. Zoey contributes this: “Oh, I had friend who had one of those. Those things don’t always work.” (Okay, we need to learn more about Zoey’s past, just a suggestion.)
For now, though, Zoey is really invested in working on this stabbing victim. She is crestfallen that all she gets to do is put pressure on one of the major wounds. Jackie, with no time for her whining, tells her to let go if she thinks it‘s not necessary. Zoey does, blood shoots across the room (J: “See that? It‘s important!”), and Zoey’s eyes light up as she realizes her participation is a bit more critical than she realized.
Then she focuses on the weapon sticking out of the victim. “Can I at least take the knife out?” Jackie, teeth gritted, reminds her that only surgeons can do that. Zoey sighs, then casts her lustful eyes back on the knife, licking her lips. “So… tempting.”
Okay, maybe we DON’T need any more backstory on Zoey.
Throughout all of this frivolity, Eddie keeps texting and trying to call Jackie. She’s finally had enough of that, and goes to settle whatever this is about.
To find that Eddie has a gift for her, a bracelet. For their 1-year anniversary. Jackie has no clue that it’s been a year, and even seems a little surprised that “relationship” is even part of the conversation. Jackie won’t even try it on, and even says she doesn’t want to be seen wearing it. Understandably, Eddie is not happy with this reaction. There is no parting kiss.
Conveniently, Jackie then stumbles across a child molester in the ward who has a catheter stuck in his business. She uses this opportunity to relieve frustration by ripping it out of him.
Momo is not supportive about this development. He drags Jackie’s ass outside. You do NOT do this, what’s the deal? Jackie fesses up about the boyfriend and not realizing it was the 1-year anniversary. Momo is stunned that she even HAD a boyfriend. (Well, hell, does he also not know that she’s married with children? How much is Jacks hiding, and why?)
In an odd twist, Eddie gives the bracelet to Coop. You had to have been there.
Then we have Momo consoling Zoey, because she apparently had a vision where God told her she had a bald spot. The mind boggles. Momo tells her he’s going to fix it, and races off, with Zoey calling after him “Momo don’t. God’s MEAN!”
Still don’t know what that was all about.
Jackie has another scene, in the Hall of Guilt, natch, where Jackie consoles the stabbing victim’s date. Turns out it was their FIRST date, and it seems sobbing needy girl is convinced that this is the best man she’s ever met. The wheels turn in Jackie’s head.
Jackie then meets with Dr. O’Hara, who is still exuding blazing signs that something is terribly amiss on her unique home planet. Jacks fesses up about Eddie and the bracelet. (O’H: So “Coop’s flitting about in your jewelry?”) O’Hara tells Jackie to go clean up her mess, and Jackie embarks on said mission, but not before stealing some pills from O’Hara. Such good friends.
Jackie somewhat makes up with Eddie, Eddie gets the bracelet back from Coop, gives it to Jackie, and the co-dependent drug relationship is re-established. Yay.
Then Jackie embarks on the obligatory mission she has in every episode, where she does something that is definitely legally wrong and usually morally questionable as well. This is her trademark. She goes to the stabbing victim, jacks up his morphine drip, then messes with his head to get him to think his date (the one with the crazy husband who tried to kill him) is really an angel on earth. Then Jackie gives him Eddie’s bracelet to bestow on sobbing girl.
O’Hara and Jackie meet again, O’Hara is obviously needing some attention due to the mysterious trouble on her planet, Jacks invites her to stay the night at her house. (So at least SOMEBODY knows that Jackie has a full-scale family back at the ranch, I was beginning to wonder.)
At the homestead, O’Hara gets really drunk, and somewhat fesses up her troubles. Something to do with a stepfather and a devastated sister? It’s not really clear. And O’Hara is rude, because she can’t help it. (“Getting plastered in Queens? I’m already destroyed.”) Hubby don’t like and goes to bed.
In the morning, hung-over O’Hara French braids Grace’s hair for her first day at private school. (After first saying to younger daughter Fiona that “You are a tiny cruel little creature” based on her coffee-making efforts. Fiona replies “I know.”) End scene.
Okay, this was the first episode where I wasn’t fully satisfied. Something was off. Fingers crossed that the writers were just setting things in place for later delivery. Not sure, but let’s get this thing back on track, shall we?
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