So, it turns out that apparently Clayton's heart attack in the last episode was not all that serious, as he's up on his feet within hours and promising all the characters that don't have their own scene this week that he'll take better care of himself. Then he goes of to chop wood or build a barn or something. The miracles of modern television medicine!
Meanwhile, not back at the ranch...
"Dandy" is all over this episode. This is the mean, worthless drunk guy that showed up this season for no apparent reason, and Cliff has taken him under his wing because he reminds him of his own mean, worthless drunk daddy, Digger Barnes. Always a good foundation for a strong relationship, right? Dandy keeps babbling endlessly about his "nose for oil", and the two of them are running around in their co-dependency, working on plans to make a fortune.
Now, I don't know what the scriptwriters INTENDED to have happen with the Dandy character, but I'm assuming they expected the audience to learn to love this nasty little jerk because of the sheer number of scenes where Dandy and Cliff are basically playing house and "growing". But I'm not buying it for a second. Can't stand the man, I'm ready for a new plotline, stat.
Of course, they probably WILL find oil together in a weak attempt to teach us "there is good in everyone", with the two of them dancing around while gushes of oil shoot out of a phallic drilling rig....
Speaking of, Andrew Stevens as Casey Denault is still taking core samples with Marilee, despite his misgivings about J.R. wanting him to use his body in that way. Please. You're fine with your lying, cheating, stealing, and general unseemly behavior, but you've got issues with sex as bargaining chip? Get over it. It's 10 minutes out of your day, you'll spend more time at the Wendy's drive-thru. Now go!
April is still suspicious of big-haired Nicholas, he's still stupidly trying to dominate Sue Ellen with the Valentine merger/buyout/whatever the hell it is, Sue Ellen is still refusing to let April have any part of whatever it is, April is still jogging a lot. I think that catches us up with that thread.
Lately we've been seeing yet another new character, Lisa, who apparently is stalking little Christopher, taking pics of him at a museum and "accidentally" letting Bobby slam into her at an ice-skating rink while Christopher is out in the middle of said ice, looking homely. Then all three of them have ice cream. This is a sure sign that trouble lurks around the corner.
Ray mysteriously takes off for D.C. to meet with Donna (we don't actually see her, natch, Susan Howard is long gone at this point), which sends Jenna into a slight tizzy and Charly into a much more violent tizzy that the world is surely coming to an end, since at her age she's one huge hormone vat and goes off the deep end every time the wind blows.
And to end this entry, a personal note to the stylists on the show: STOP MESSING WITH LINDA GRAY'S HAIR. Seriously. The little bun on the top of the head you introduced this season? Stop it. It makes Sue Ellen look like a misguided lesbian school teacher. Not that there's anything wrong with lesbians, school teachers or buns, but that is NOT Sue Ellen's look.
And don't get me started on whoever thought it would be fun to sculpt the ponytail sticking straight up from the top of Linda's head. Dear gawd. THAT stylist was clearly on acid and should be fired. This is "Dallas", not a Wang Chung video. Style accordingly.
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